Beautifully Complex
189: When Mom or Dad is Neurodivergent Too, with Terry Matlen, MSW

189: When Mom or Dad is Neurodivergent Too, with Terry Matlen, MSW

September 14, 2022

Seeing that ADHD and autism can be genetic, it stands to reason that there are many neurodivergent parents raising neurodivergent kids. Terry Matlen is one of them, but she’s also an expert on ADHD, especially in women. In this episode, Terry shares the feelings of guilt and inadequacy she felt raising her kids, because she struggled with many of the daily tasks due to her ADHD. She also offers some simple strategies to help make things like preparing meals and cleaning up more manageable when you may be struggling with executive functioning skills yourself.

188: School Struggles Are Real — Here’s How to Help, with Penny Williams

188: School Struggles Are Real — Here’s How to Help, with Penny Williams

August 31, 2022

One in five children has a learning disability or attention issue that causes school struggles. In the U.S. alone, that’s approximately 56.6 million students (Educationdata.org). And yet, we continue with an educational system that is solely focused on conformity and compliance. It is built for your average student with little consideration for those that can’t succeed in that system, even though they are virtually required to. 

My own son is one of those students and, despite a gifted intelligence, he graduated high school feeling stupid and worthless. He’s one of millions with a similar experience and that’s just not ok. That’s why I created the free, online School Struggles Summit. In this podcast episode, I’m sharing some of the amazing insights and strategies from the experts in the Summit. You have actionable strategies here in this overview and the opportunity to register for the Summit and learn so much more to help your struggling child or student have the opportunity to succeed in school (in their own way).

PAP 187: Compliance vs. Regulation, with Greg Santucci

PAP 187: Compliance vs. Regulation, with Greg Santucci

August 24, 2022

Most of our systems that involve children are designed on the compliance model — that’s true in parenting and educating. We’ve leaned on compliance in our educational system since the 1800s, and it’s been part of our parenting culture for centuries.

And yet, neuroscience has now taught us that there’s a monumentally better way. Through research we know that our neurobiology is a driving force in behavior — particularly our autonomic nervous system and our brain. We know that there are sensitivities and differences in our neurodivergent kids’ neurobiology too, making it crucial that we adopt this brain-based lens when responding to and managing behavior. 

In this episode, OT Greg Santucci, explains why focusing on regulation (and dysregulation) are both a more effective and more humanistic approach than compliance. He also provides some actionable mindset shifts and strategies to help you implement a regulation model right away.

PAP 186: Ensuring a Smooth Start to the New School Year, with Stephanie Pitts & Rachel Kapp of Learn Smarter

PAP 186: Ensuring a Smooth Start to the New School Year, with Stephanie Pitts & Rachel Kapp of Learn Smarter

August 17, 2022

Most parents look forward to the start of a new school year. Their kids no longer need to be entertained all day every day and they get a bit of a break. However, if you the parent of a neurodivergent kid who struggles in school, you probably dread the start of a new school year — I know I did. 

 

In this episode of the Beautifully Complex Podcast, I’m talking with educational therapists, Stephanie Pitts and Rachel Kapp about how to create a plan for a smooth start to the school year. You’ll learn about the 3 systems you need to support, how to simplify, and the communication necessary for your child to have a good school year.

185: The Art of Talking to Children, with Rebecca Rolland, Ed.D.

185: The Art of Talking to Children, with Rebecca Rolland, Ed.D.

August 10, 2022

The way we talk to our child matters. Not only does it become the little voice inside their heads and influence how they feel about themselves, but it can foster connection, build communication skills, and inspire confidence and resilience. 

In this episode, Rebecca Rolland, Ed.D. shares her formula for Rich Talk and other strategies from her book, “The Art of Talking with Children: The Simple Keys to Nurturing Kindness, Creativity, and Confidence in Kids.” Learn how to implement reflective and active listening with your child and what benefits you and your child will be rewarded with when you do. Rebecca’s strategies help engage kids, make them feel seen, heard, and validated, and nurture their relationship with you.

PAP 184: How to Be a Conscious Parent, with Lauren Pace

PAP 184: How to Be a Conscious Parent, with Lauren Pace

August 3, 2022

Parents are human beings, nowhere near perfect. Often that means that we bring baggage from our childhood, our experiences, our own parents and let it color our parenting. We end up stuck on auto-pilot and often feel shame and blame when reflecting on tough parenting moments. Conscious parenting is about healing your own self so you can show up and be the parent you want to be for your kids. In this episode, Behavior Coach Lauren Pace outlines the steps necessary to make a shift to parenting with awareness and intention and creating the family life you really want. 

PAP 183: How to Foster Connection with Neurodivergent Kids, The Behavior Revolution

PAP 183: How to Foster Connection with Neurodivergent Kids, The Behavior Revolution

July 27, 2022

One of the most impactful and transformative aspects of parenting is your relationship with your child (this is also true of the teacher-child relationship). A solid, calm, trusting relationship helps keep everyone regulated and feeling good. In this episode, Sarah Wayland, Ph.D. and I offer you four actionable strategies to foster connection with your child and build the relationship you want and need.

PAP 182: The Disruptors, with Nancy Armstrong

PAP 182: The Disruptors, with Nancy Armstrong

July 20, 2022

The new documentary film, The Disruptors, hears from many game-changing people about their ADHD and the vital role it has played in their success, and takes an immersive look at our approach to ADHD that debunks the most harmful myths, intimately taking viewers inside a number of families as they navigate the challenges-and the surprising triumphs-of living with ADHD.

In this episode, I talk with executive producer, Nancy Armstrong, about why she wanted to create a film about ADHD and how this film can change the course of the lives of children with ADHD and their parents. Listen in, watch the film, and share it with the educators and other adults in your child’s life. Change begins with each of us.

PAP 181: Growing Up Feeling ”Other,” Part 2, with Jonathan Joly

PAP 181: Growing Up Feeling ”Other,” Part 2, with Jonathan Joly

July 6, 2022

This is Part 2 of my conversation with Jonathan Joly. If you haven’t yet, listen to Part 1, episode 180. There’s still so much for parents of neurodivergent kids to learn from Jonathan - so much that it’s two episodes. 

PAP 180: Growing Up Feeling ”Other,” Part 1, with Jonothan Joly

PAP 180: Growing Up Feeling ”Other,” Part 1, with Jonothan Joly

June 30, 2022

Our culture has come a long way with acceptance, but there’s still so much further to go. We’re still very much a society based on conformity and normalizing everyone. I don’t have to tell you, but that simply doesn’t work. What happens when we keep pushing people to be our definition of “normal” when it isn’t who they are? They end up feeling “other” - unheard, unseen, and misunderstood. 

This is the life Jonathan Joly describes in his new book, “All My Friends Are Invisible.” Growing up with ADHD, dyslexia and questioning his identity, Jonathan felt that there was no tolerance in the world for a kid with, what he calls, my “crazy mind” and differences. So he had to create a world where he was valued more than in the real world… a world in his imagination. His invisible, imaginary friends allowed him to be 100 percent himself, without judgment, bullying, and shame. 

There’s so much for parents of neurodivergent kids to learn from Jonathan in his story, and in the way he parents his own children. He talks about how he didn’t finish school, but went back later and got a university degree and graduated with honors, how there’s a freedom to embracing who you are, and the coping mechanisms that he created and used to keep going in a world that rejected him. 

This is one of the most emotional, moving, and inspirational conversations I’ve had. I know you’ll find it impactful too.

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